Many times I struggle with feeling like I’m adequate. An adequate wife, mother, and youth leader.
But I need to remember that even if I don’t feel like I’m up to the task, or even performing it well, God has trusted me with it anyway.
I met my husband at 17, got engaged at 18, and married at 19. That wasn’t in the plan, to get married so young, but it’s what happened.
I have struggled from the beginning feeling like I don’t deserve a man like Matt. A wonderful man. A man who has given me no reasons to doubt my worth, yet I do it anyway.
I have struggled with not being the wife that I feel like he deserves, or that I want to be for him. I think a lot of that is due to my age. I don’t have the life experience or maturity to be the woman I want to be yet. But I want to be that woman so bad.
I know that will come with time, and thank heavens my husband is so loving and patient and kind. Thank the Lord that HE is so loving, and patient and kind. But as we all know, it’s hard to be patient with ourselves. And I struggle with that.
Yet I know that all this happened in the Lords timing. The right timing. And that is what hit me as I pondered these things today.
I met my husband right when I was meant to. I have no doubt about that.
I got married at exactly the age I was supposed to. It wasn’t in my plan, but it was in Heavenly Fathers.
God sent me my daughter, and made me a mother, exactly when she needed to come to earth. In retrospect, when I needed her to. I just didn’t know it. But God did.
And now that same truth can be applied to my calling into young women’s.
My point is, God didn’t wait until I was ready to be the perfect wife to send me my sweet husband.
He didn’t wait until I was ready to be a perfect mother to send me my daughter.
He didn’t wait til I was older and wiser to put me in with the young women. He put me in there at 22.
Because He knows that, although imperfect, I am capable of doing great good in every area of my life.
He knows that, though imperfect, I can be a tool in His hands. I can accomplish the tasks He sets before me.
God doesn’t wait until we’re perfect to give us responsibilities and tests. Most times He asks things of us long before we reach the point where we feel ready, let alone perfect. So why do we expect ourselves to be?
He doesn’t. He just wants us to try, and to use His help when we don’t measure up. Alone we may not be up to the task. It happens. But partnered with God, we can do anything. You can do anything.
“Whom the Lord calls, He qualifies.”
You are enough, just as you are. The Lord can use you just as you are. How? Because with God’s help, and with His grace, you can become MORE than you are. In fact, in the end, you can become like Him.
In His time, and in His way.
Be patient with yourselves. Trust in His timing. He is patient with you, and His timing will always be perfect.